Don't Do What Donny Don't Does
In just two short weeks I'll be celebrating the twenty first annual celebration of my tumultuous birth. Scary, no?
In order to share with you just how incredibly talented I am, I thought I'd post one of the invites I so brilliantly crafted a few weeks ago. If you're awesome enough you may already have one of these babies with your name on it.
But my foray into the world of creative design didn't go off without the occasional hitch - hence I present a few of Ben's Do's And Don'ts To Invitation Creation:
Do: Put up an adorable photo.
Don't: Allow your Mum to go through your photos, as she may stumble across ones of you throwing up over a balcony and/or wearing women's underwear.
Do: Spend ages creating appropriate and clever backgrounds - it makes you cool.
Don't: Spend ages creating appropriate and clever backgrounds - no-one fucking cares.
Do: Make the wording on your invite hilarious.
Don't: Put in a stupid joke that no-one gets, leading them into a false contention that there actually will be a mechanical bull at your party.
and once you've finished,
Do: Carry a few invites around with you at all times, that way you can hand them out to people as you see them.
Don't: Get drunk and hand them out to random people you just met.
Double Don't: Get REALLY drunk and hand them out to teachers from your high school.
Seriously, don't - your friends won't be impressed.
posted by Ben @ 3:17 PM
15 Comments:
Too true, I relate to all that invite etiquette cos I went through it all about a month ago, and it wasn't even my party. I PLEADED a friend of mine if I could design his invites then I went all crazy and weird about it cos i'd spent so much time obsessing over the "jokes" and font and crap, and I carried with me all the time and threw them at random strangers. So if you are looking for people to promote your party SAFELY, then I'm not that person.
Arh well, thanks anyway Svetstar.
way to show the whole internet how you used your blog background on your invitations.
Ummmm, thanks?
so which teachers can we expect at your party ben??? and how did you come across high school teachers while insanely drunk.
Long story short, I was a tad over-inebriated at the Edgy a few weeks ago and bumped into one of the female teachers from my old school. Despite the fact that I was never in a class with her, she recognized me and we had a chat. As I tend to become rather over-enthusiastic in a drunken state, the next thing I knew I had invited her and her teaching friends to come along.
Still, it was a good idea at the time and I stand by it. There's nothing like a few crazy guests to make the night just that little bit more random.
Mind you, they haven't RSVP'd so they probably won't show.
Mind you, NO-ONE fucking RSVP'd so who knows who'll show up.
Should be fun, sucks to be anyone missing out.
Long story short my arse Ben.
Tool.
Benji I know most times you become "rather over-enthusiastic in a drunken state" but can next time you please refrain from sending messages to my staff members who have no idea who you are and freaking them out.
Thanks babe
Hahaha, thanks for posting that Mich - just the kind of embarassing story I want everybody knowing about.
I already apologised to the poor girl, won't happen again.
Awww, Benny your photo is cute. But haven't you learnt by now to STAY AWAY FROM THE EDGY, YO'. That shit is all bad.
That is all, enjoy your party :-)
Ooh, tell us the embarrassing story that Mich alluded to that you don't want us to know about?
What girl did you harrass, Ben???
Oh, and you can't say that no one RSVPed... I did.
Hurry up and update, I'm a new convert to your blog and need a fix, hehe.
Martie - it's a tough choice sometimes.
a) Go all the way into the city, go to a decent place but then have to shell out 40 bucks for a cab home.
b) Go to the Edgy, drink so much that you start to think the place is Ok - then score a free lift home.
I'm a lazy man Martie, and I like my beer.
Alex - Mich is exaggerating, all I did was send a drunken message to someone who had no idea who I was. Luckily I was sober enough not to write anything too controversial. I think it was something along the lines of:
'Hey, Mihc gav me yor number. How are yuo? I'm at a bal and me drunk. Haev a godo nigth!!11!!'
Give or take a few spelling errors.
Sam - there'll be one up by the end of the night old friend, just for you.
But as Ruby knows, that could be a lie.
Wow, looks like you actually put at least a moderate amount of work into making those. I usually just buy a box of Pokémon/smiley face/generic invites.
What can I say - I'm an artist.
Either that or a loser with way too much time on his hands.
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