Cartoon Copulation
Scandal rocks Things I've Written!
It's not often that a juicy exclusive falls into my hands. Normally I have to bust my arse in order to present some kind of shocking revelation. And by shocking revelation I mean counting the amount of Von Dutch hats I see in a day. I still can't believe I did that, talk about an un-appreciated waste of time. I sat there waiting in front of my letterbox for months, waiting for that all too elusive invitation to the Nobel Awards. But was I recognised for my tireless pursuits? Nay.
Anyway, our story begins this Monday evening. I was having a few Crown Lagers at my dear friend Michelle's house to celebrate my birthday, when I stumbled into to the bathroom and found this hanging on the wall*:
Seems innocent enough no? Wile E Coyote and The Road Runner, those old foes that have entertained us for generations with their hilarious cat-and-mouse antics. But did you ever wonder what Wile E Coyote was going to do with The Road Runner once he caught him?
Let's have a closer look.
That's right, sodomise him..
Don't believe me? Again, a closer look.
Now I'm no prude, but I'll be damned if I'm going to let my kids watch a show with such underlying filth as this.
The Road Runner is a slut. Look at him. Is it a him? I dunno, but that thing is a slut.
Look at it! Just freaking look at it!
You can barely blame Wile E Coyote for the massive boner he's sporting - one can only resist such a magnificently sprawled out specimen for so long.
Let's hope The Road Runner gets what's coming to him - a mighty sore sphincter and an anvil to the skull.
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*Photos taken with my new digital camera, ohhh yeah. Thanks to Michelle for allowing me to photograph her bathroom - without her knowledge.
posted by Ben @ 9:55 PM
9 Comments:
Ben dearest,
I applaud your efforts for that has got to be one of the best exclusives i have ever stumbled upon...keep it up!
hmm... i'm wondering why one would take a digital camera to the bathroom in the first place.
what were you going to photograph if that picture didn't grab your attention?
Benny,
Surely you remember seeing that picture at Michelle's party in May, you, Gibbo, Caz and I had a good old laugh about it...or maybe you had comsumend one too many Crownies that night?!
But well done on sneaking the photo, Michelle should feel priveledged!
Love you darling, ready for some more 'Uni Ball' type dancing ;)
KT! xox
Should someone with a boyfriend really being saying the words love you and suggesting dirty dancing to an ex KT?? Seems theres more controversy surrounding this post than just a picture from Michelles bathroom.
From a concerned citzen whos protecting Bens body from harm and controversy.
Thanks foolish, glad you're as shocked as I was.
Jenno - excellent, excellent point, a most amusing comment. What I failed to mention was I'd gotten the digital camera that day and was carrying it around with me everywhere. I had no intention of photographing my crown jewels. Although....
Katie - I did roughly recall such an occasion, but couldn't pin it down to when so I pretended I hadn't seen it before. Poetic license.
Anon - thanks for you concern. I can only assume you'll be there on Saturday and will watch my back. Katie sure is one unstoppable hell-cat.
Naughty.
Well thank goodness for that. I must say that Adam and I were quite concerned as to why you were in the bathroom so long with your new camera but we didn't want to say anything.
Thankyou for solving the mystery.
And from now on, stay the hell out of my bathroom!
Hey, if you don't want people taking photos in your bathroom, maybe you shouldn't hang so much filth on the wall.
Honestly, it's like a Phuket Girlie-Bar in there.
You know I tried to think of an alternative explanation for what that boner thing could be, but... there isn't one. It's not like it could be his knee or anything. It could only be a coyote erection.
Creepy.
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